Updates from Steve-O
July 8, 2008
Hello Everyone...
Hello Everyone,
I can best describe the depression that led me to check into this looney bin as "a feeling of uselessness". I was finding it impossible to forgive myself for horrible things that I've done in the past, feeling like I couldn't live up to my new expectations of myself, and like I was stuck being someone that I wasn't proud of being. Depression was kicking my ass, so I went to my doctor for help, and he told me I'd better check into this funny farm. I believe that the best treatment for just about every disease of the mind is to be of service to others, and in order for addicts to stay in recovery from addiction, they must do things that make them feel useful. I've stayed clean for four months now, but, judging by the depression that brought me to this nut house, I need to do much more in the way of being useful. What I'm getting at here is that I think I might just be able to stay clean, and live a happier, fuller life, if I come up with lots of silly little ways (or big ones) to "live usefully". One day, not long ago, when I was deliberate about thinking of others and being useful, it turned out to be a really great day for me, Ryan Simonetti, and a whole bunch of little kids. I turned my birthday into a SKATEBOARD RAGE-O-RAMA! Check it out!:
http://www.jackassworld.com/blog/2008/07/08/steve-os-birthday-party
Just writing this has made me feel much better, now I think I'm going to write up a whole bunch of ridiculous ideas to usefully and ridiculously try to make the world a way radder place. I Love You All,
Steve-O
July 3, 2008
I’m Back In The Looney Bin...
Hello Everyone,
After seeing "Dr. Drew's Celebrity Addiction Special" on VH1 News, I figured it was time to put something out there for you all. I expected my part on that show to be much harder to watch than it wound up being. It made me want to explain a little bit of what I've been going through since I got clean, to help some of you understand how much damage drugs and alcohol have really done to me. I've now been clean for 115 days, and I'm, again, in a mental institution. I did so much cocaine, ketamine, pcp, nitrous oxide, and all sorts of other drugs, that, quite simply, my brain is fucked up. As you can probably tell by the way I'm writing this, my cognitive skills are alright, but, I frequently suffer from horrible mood swings and severe depression. Those of you who have followed my warped mind's trail on the Internet for a significant amount of time have, I'm sure, been very aware of those attributes, but, I just want you all to know that four fucking months (almost) of not touching a damn thing that a psychiatrist didn't perscribe to me hasn't changed that shit. The medication that is prescribed to me doesn't do the trick every day, let's just put it that way. I'm back in the looney bin trying to get that shit right. The bottom line is that doing drugs fucked my ass up and I'm going to be paying for it for a long time, probably for the rest of my life. Everyone's going to make their own decisions in life, but nobody needs to make the same mistakes I made. I love you all,
Steve-O
June 5, 2008
This Is Still My Favorite Cartoon Ever...
I really do love this thing, way to put me in my place, PCoffin! Comment away, everyone! Thoughts on 2012? Religious discussions open. Steve-O bashing extravaganza!
Lets try to make this the number 1 blog on MySpace!
I Love You All!
Steve-O
June 4, 2008
Why I Took Down My Last Three Blogs
When the alcohol and drugs were taken away, it was clear that they were not the problem- just a symptom of the problem.. The problem is me. If alcohol and drugs were the problem, then my life would surely straighten itself out. Well, it hasn't. What getting clean did was made me realize why I was killing myself with alcohol and drugs- because I've got so many problems going on with me. There's no denying that I am completely powerless to defeat these problems without some serious help, so I've got to do a whole lot of thinking about God- as I understand God. What I have been doing, that caused me to have horrible-ass nightmares last night, is "thinking out loud" on the Internet and, especially in that last blog, I feel I was disrespectful to the God of other people's understanding. That is why I took down those blogs. Someone asked what "Namaste" means, it means "I honor the God that is in us all". For being disrespectful, I sincerely apologize. I'm going to go ahead and take a break from being too deep on here for a while, I'll be back soon, and with a banger!
I Love You All,
Steve-O
P.S. Here's some footage I shot a couple weeks ago:
June 3, 2008
My New Favorite Cartoon...
Here's something I wrote to Dr. Drew today, followed by my favorite new cartoon:
Drew,
How's it going? It's great to be writing an e-mail that's just to you, not ninety-plus people. Although I'm still clean, it's very debatable how close I am to becoming sober. I have good news about my court case, the vandalism charge was never filed and the cocaine possession case was deferred. I have to return in July to prove that I'm in sober living and then I won't have to go back for two years. Provided that I'll have made it that long without getting into any trouble, the case will be dismissed.
Each time I've gone to court, there have been paparazzi cameras waiting for me as I walked in and out- I've spoken to TMZ and E!, and had clips run immediately both previous times, but not today. Let me tell you why. Today, when asked how it went, after I said, "I did it!", I explained that I find it curious that my "run-of-the-mill" cocaine possession case is getting more attention than Planet X, also known as "The Fifth Sun", which is coming into our solar system to wipe virtually all life from the face of the Earth. I went on to explain that I believe I got sober so that I could really look into God, Keylontic Science, and the multi-dimensional reality of human beings. It blows me away that people are so afraid to think of God and, heaven forbid, the idea of dying, let alone within the next four years. The paparazzi footage from today appeared nowhere, all that showed up was some copy to indicate that I had plead guilty.
http://www.funnyordie.com/videos/27b263f246
Namaste,
Steve-O
June 2, 2008
Call Me Nuts, But The World’s Really Gonna End...
Today, during one of my groups, we had an exercise in answering the question, "Who does your head tell you that you are?" I said that my head tells me I am a human being that is here to inspire others. I went on to explain that my methods have varied- I've served as a distraction from troubles, as a negative (and positive) influence, and as a thought-provoker of sorts.
It is commonly said that absolutely nothing happens in God's universe for no reason, and I've come to believe that wholeheartedly. I've read that, as spirits, we choose our human parents, based on the genetic make-up that best serves the task we decided to take on in our human life. I believe that my Higher Self, or my Oversoul, chose my parents, specifically, because I am here to play a vital role in the rebirth of humanity as it will exist in the Fifth World, multi-dimensionally.
To many, I'm sure this sounds nuts, but, to play the role that I must play, I must be perceived as nuts.. To have accomplished that, I couldn't have chosen my parents better. My Mother had the intelligence, sense of humor, and social skills of a goddess, and her entire family tree is, and was, shrouded in the disease of addiction, literally, virtually every leaf upon it. Dad's family tree bore the fruits of academia- all phd's, master's degrees, zoologists, and the like. Dad was the first in his lineage to "break the mold", he became a businessman. Dad was more than successful, he is possibly the most fiercely motivated man I've ever known. He would ensure, despite my life-long struggles with addiction, that I be well-educated and that he lend me the business-savy to guarantee that I become very successful in my humor-oriented, addiction-based, and psychopathic career. The very career which brought me the notoriety (for being nuts) that I need to reach enough people, and get through to the right ones, to accomplish my task.
The following comes from the Keylontic Dictionary:
Family Tree of Consciousness
Last update:
September 25, 2006
(Higher Self)
The structure of the 6 primary levels of Multidimensional Identity represents a literal Family Tree of Consciousness through which all humans are connected to each other, all other life forms, the Universes, the Cosmos and Source Mind – one Mind ("God" or God-Source)
The 6 primary levels of Identity are:
1) The Incarnate Identity – Tauren (See: Incarnate Matrix)
2) The Soul Identity – Dora (See: Soul Matrix)
3) The Oversoul Identity – Teura (See: Oversoul Matrix)
4) The Avatar Identity – Dolar (See: Dolar Matrix)
5) The Rishi Identity – Solar (See: Solar Matrix)
6) The Gemantic Entity – Geomancy (See: Yunasai Matrix)
(Commonly referred as the Higher Self)
From the perspective of the Incarnate Identity (HU-1) the process of evolution is the process of incorporation all 6 levels of multi-dimensional identity into the conscious cognition of "I am…"
(See: Density Levels)
The first step in awakening multi-dimensional identity is to bring the Soul Matrix (the HU-2 Superconscious Mind) into conscious recognition within the biologically focused personality. This process is called Soul Integration.
(See: Stair Step Creation)
(Voyagers I – Page 137)
Learning to connect to you Higher Self is very, very important if you want to be responsible for your own evolutionary process and get answers to the many questions you may have during the ascension process. Tapping into the Soul Matrix is the first step. Knowing that you are the member of a Family Tree of Consciousness and that the fact that you exist implies that there are 11 other physical incarnates beings in different time-space locations as part of your Soul. Your soul is a plural with 12 faces and is part of a larger identity called the Oversoul that is composed of 12 souls – each with their 12 incarnate identities, so you are dealing with 144 incarnates in your immediate Oversoul family.
Let me thank you all, so much, for the support I got from reading your replies to the blog I posted yesterday. here's something I wrote to my family today:
From reading replies to yesterday's blog, and discussing in groups and with Tom, I believe I've worked through my fear of God. God is Prime Creator, the ultimate parent, and what parent is not forgiving? Furthermore, to achieve sobriety, I must pray to God to remove my fears- how can I pray to that which I fear... TO REMOVE MY FEARS!!! For today, my idea of "being saved" is of forgiving myself for the wrongs I have done. My new perspective on being happy is in learning to like myself, by doing what I can to make my amends for that which has caused the guilt and the shame that burdens, which led me to punish myself with drugs and alcohol. When we take away the drugs and alcohol, indeed, we find that they were never the problem, rather, the problem is we do not know who we are, or how to like ourselves, so we seek an escape from reality. Dad, when you asked me what the difference is between "clean" and "sober" I said something about clean meaning that you can pass a drug test and not set off a breathalyzer, while sober means that you have peace of mind. I think that's about right, and I just want you guys to know that I'm praying for peace of mind. Love you lots,
Steve
Now, about this "world ending" business. Until now, I've left the number 2012 out of it, but that is, indeed, what's going on here:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VW4h1u842Xc&feature=related
Namaste,
Steve-O
June 1, 2008
I’ve Got Lots Of Apologizing To Do
I went to sleep last night, just like I woke up this morning, fearing God- for all of the wrong I've done in this human life. I used to think of "being saved" as some kind of joke, like you could just be laying on your deathbed after a life of doing things that you knew damn well were wrong, then say some half-assed prayer accepting "The Lord Somebody-Or-Other" as your "Savior" and you'd be perfectly fine once you had passed on. For those of you who don't believe that we all exist eternally in other dimensions as non-human entities, look up the "Pleiadians".
I believe it is obvious that this human existence is a test, to see how we will perform with free will, the ability to make our own choices. The Pleiadians describe our existence as a task that our other-dimensional selves agreed to take on, during the most difficult of times, despite the fact that it involved forgetting what it is. I don't want to seem like I'm pretending to know a whole lot, because I don't, I just know that I'm carrying a bunch of guilt for wrong that I've done, and that I need to do something about it all before humanity becomes extinct as we know it.
The clock is ticking. It wasn't a big deal to wipe out dinosaurs and, with the way that we were put here to disrespect this planet, it's resources, and the life on it, our virtual extinction surely seems to be part of a much bigger plan. The signs are now, and have been, everywhere. From what I gather it is the "Fifth Sun", or "Planet X" that is headed for our solar system to end the "Fourth World", and bring about the beginning of the "Fifth World". As I understand it, the approach of Planet X is responsible for the hurricanes, tsunamis, cyclones, earthquakes and other Earth changes that we refer to as "disasters". Just as we had other-dimensional help to go from bashing two rocks together in a cave to building Stonehenge and the Great Pyramids overnight, we have been helped to ensure that World War 3 involves enough nuclear fallout to ensure that the job is done on schedule.
It is not time to become afraid of the end of your human life, that is as natural as a leaf dying in the fall. It is, however, time think of "being saved". It doesn't matter what you name or God, or what religion you follow, it simply matters that you follow it for the right reason- to right the wrongs of your past… To Be Good…
I Love You All,
Steve-O
P.S. I don't understand how, or why, more people aren't discussing this, but, let's not forget that famine will be EVERYONE'S problem, REAL SOON. Here's why:
Ecological Apocalypse: Why Are All The Bees Dying?
2007 04 10
By Paul Joseph Watson
GM, toxic chemicals, chemtrails destroying eco-system, threatening very survival of humanity
The alarming decline in bee populations across the United States and Europe represents a potential ecological apocalypse, an environmental catastrophe that could collapse the food chain and wipe out humanity. Who and what is behind this flagrant abuse of the eco-system?
Many people don't realize the vital role bees play in maintaining a balanced eco-system. According to experts, if bees were to become extinct then humanity would perish after just four years.
"If the bee disappeared off the surface of the globe then man would only have four years of life left. No more bees, no more pollination, no more plants, no more animals, no more man," said Albert Einstein.
Reports that bee populations are declining at rates of up to 80% in areas of the U.S. and Europe should set alarm bells ringing and demand immediate action on behalf of environmental organizations. Experts are calling the worrying trend "colony collapse disorder" or CCD.
"Bee numbers on parts of the east coast and in Texas have fallen by more than 70 percent, while California has seen colonies drop by 30 to 60 percent," reports AFP.
"Approximately 40 percent of my 2,000 colonies are currently dead and this is the greatest winter colony mortality I have ever experienced in my 30 years of beekeeping," apiarist Gene Brandi, from the California State Beekeepers Association, told Congress recently.
The article states that U.S. bee colonies have been dropping since 1980 and the number of beekeepers have halved.
Scientists are thus far stumped as to what is causing the decline, ruling out parasites but leaning towards some kind of new toxin or chemical used in agriculture as being responsible. "Experts believe that the large-scale use of genetically modified plants in the US could be a factor," reports Germany's Spiegal Online.
Bee populations throughout Germany have simultaneously dropped 25% and up to 80% in some areas. Poland, Switzerland and Spain are reporting similar declines. Studies have shown that bees are not dying in the hive, something is causing them to lose their sense of orientation so that they cannot return to the hive. Depleted hives are not being raided for their honey by other insects, which normally happens when bees naturally die in the winter, clearly suggesting some kind of poisonous toxin is driving them away.
"In many cases, scientists have found evidence of almost all known bee viruses in the few surviving bees found in the hives after most have disappeared. Some had five or six infections at the same time and were infested with fungi -- a sign, experts say, that the insects' immune system may have collapsed."
A study at the University of Jena from 2001 to 2004 showed that toxins from a genetically modified maize variant designed to repel insects, when combined with a parasite, resulted in a "significantly stronger decline in the number of bees" than normal.
"According to Hans-Hinrich Kaatz, a professor at the University of Halle in eastern Germany and the director of the study, the bacterial toxin in the genetically modified corn may have "altered the surface of the bee's intestines, sufficiently weakening the bees to allow the parasites to gain entry -- or perhaps it was the other way around. We don't know."
Kaatz was desperate to continue his studies but funding was cut off.
While we are lectured by government to change our lifestyle and cough up more taxes for the supposed peril of man-made global warming, an environmental catastrophe that could eliminate the human race in the figurative blink of an eye is looming.
Why are major environmental groups and lobbyists ignoring this mammoth threat to our very existence? Where is Greenpeace?
The hyperbole surrounding man-made global warming is swallowing up all the attention while real dangers like the rapid die-off of bee populations and its link to GM food is largely shunned by governments and activist foundations.
Is it a stretch to hypothesize that government mandated spraying of crops with deadly chemicals as well as toxic substances contained in chemtrails could be part of a deliberate program to eliminate the bee population? Or is this just another example of big business flagrantly abusing the eco-system in order to drive up profits?
The elite have publicly stated their desire to significantly reduce world population on numerous occasions. Just yesterday we featured a story about a British Government Ministry of Defence report that postulated on the future use of bio-weapons to thin the human population in under 30 years.
Making bees all but extinct would be a swift and plausibly deniable method of enacting global population reduction long dreamed of by the maniacal sociopaths that control the world.
Either way, this issue represents an overwhelming threat to the food chain and an environmental crime of the highest order, for which the perpetrators need to be brought up on charges of accessories to genocide, and the chemicals responsible immediately banned.
Please circulate this article to environmental groups and demand they investigate who and what is killing our bees!
May 9
Please Try This At Home...
Today marks sixty days of abstinence from mind-altering substances for me, so I decided to treat myself to what makes me the happiest- I got together with my beloved Jen Moore and filmed something to share with you all. I don't want to ruin the surprises that I have in store with my new projects, so I chose to perform and share a very low-impact trick (it can't even be called a "stunt") that I learned so long ago I can't even remember who it was that taught it to me. I encourage everyone to try it at home and leave a comment on here to let me know how many attempts it took you to succeed. Remember, there is no such thing as a failure who keeps trying! I do read your comments, and I'd like to thank everyone for the support I've received. I've learned that it's important to love everyone, even people that you don't like, so let me thank everyone for everything. Woohoo! I've come to believe that I was put on this planet for a reason, to screw up really badly, figure that out, then go on to do some good stuff as a result. We'll see what happens. I love you all, good luck with this trick:
Steve-O
April 27, 2008
Everybody Loves A Man Of Mystery...
Hello Everyone,
I woke up recently feeling like I was doing everything for the benefit of the masses (or those who cared enough to pay attention), and needed to concern myself less with constantly posting stuff on the Internet and more with my own business. At no point in time did it occur to me that I would stop filming ridiculous footage. I made a mental note to make sure that I "step up my game", so that I can win a bet I made, by proving that alcohol and drugs never made me more creative, talented, or crazy of a sumbitch. I knew that I wanted to focus on staying sober, film really great stuff on the weekends, and not leak everything all of the time with a bunch of manic bullshit (the way I've done in the recent past). I felt it was important to do these things and, I do believe, everybody loves a "man of mystery".
I took down all of the clips (except for one) that I've posted on YouTube, to be arranged into a project that will follow Steve-O: Paparazzi Stuntman. The name I'm thinking of for that project is Bonkers: Steve-O's Journey To And From Rock Bottom. Those of you who have been following my blogs and clips for some time are well aware that there is no shortage, whatsoever, of my journey to "rock bottom". Even though you'll have seen much of the footage before, you won't have seen the footage of me, my family, my friends, and medical professionals (wink, wink) reacting to it. You will also not have seen what I shot last weekend, this weekend, or what I will be doing as shooting continues. I am on an absolute mission to win my bet and, to properly do so, my sober journey from rock bottom must completely clobber my drunk and drugged up journey to it. Those of you that enjoy the more painful work I've done will be very pleased with what I did today. Ouch.
It looks like I have an official release date for my Universal Records rap album. It's called Steve-O: Hard As A Rock, and I'm hearing good things about a June 24th release. The whole album was recorded during what can truly be considered my "tragic decline" and, at this point, I consider it to be a "public service announcement". Paparazzi Stuntman still has no release date, but that's because it's such a gargantuan project and I've truly had much work to do to prepare it for release. It is the result of me spending almost four entire years running around with a video camera, invading the privacy of major celebrities, and inundating them with my stunts and antics. I've really kept Paparazzi Stuntman "up my sleeve", it is an absolute monster, and, now, it's time to let everyone know that it is coming. Everyone, please, enjoy this new trailer for it:
I have come to realize that there is no "middle of the road" for me. At this point, it's either completely sober or totally fallen apart, the disease of addiction takes no steps backwards. I really don't want to pick up where I left off, so, for now, I'm going to get back to working on sobriety, and healing up from today's activity. I love you all,
Steve-O
April 13, 2008
Steve-O Is Officially Cuckoo
Someone on the Internet pointed out that keeping track of the stuff I was posting, which I wrote and filmed before I was committed to the psychiatric ward, was difficult. They described it as watching me implode. A number of others were equally candid in their criticism of my extremely negative attitude and temper tantrums. While all of that was going on, I was so out of my mind that I was convinced I was perfectly sane. Now that I have abstained from the use of all mind-altering substances for just over a month, I feel compelled to sincerely thank those of you who offered that very honest and much needed criticism. I was in such a bad place, I can only describe it as "on the bring of a black hole." I'm genuinely thankful for all of you. Your support means the world to me. With all of you in mind, I've spent this past week preparing to hit the streets, once again, with my new buddy Chandler. We haven't even done it yet, but we are now ready. I've been approved for my pass, so, without further ado, let the fun begin!
I Love You All,
Steve-O
P.S. Dear Chandler and Family,
Thank you all so much for such a fantastic day. There's no way all of that could've happened without you guys. I can't wait to see the photos! Thanks again, guys!
April 6, 2008
Hollywood Will Eat You Alive
Today was the first time I left rehab with my main goal being to shoot footage. All I wanted to do was skateboard on the stars of Hollywood’s Walk Of Fame. A bunch of people came out and I was worried that the day would turn into a nightmare because I couldn’t spend time with everyone, skate, and worry about filming all at the same time. I was the only one that was ever worried and, right when my attitude took a turn for the worse, a kid came running up to me for an autograph that absolutely made my day.
Chandler,
Thank you for making today so special for me and everyone I was with. I really meant those words I wrote on your new shoes. Really, thank you, bro!
Steve-O
April 5, 2008
I’m Not Gonna Stop Hurting Myself
I’ve always felt pretty comfortable believing that nobody should consider me to be a bad person because I’ve never made a habit of physically harming anyone but myself. I have some major amends to make for verbal and emotional attacks on my loved ones, but I can say that it has been comforting to feel as though the good I’ve done has outweighed the bad. The more I think of it, I really have to make amends for the wrong I’ve done. That’s coming up in my life soon, right now I’m talking about the good stuff. When someone sees me staple my nuts, or any of the other more idiotic things I’ve done, I like to think that they are distracted from their own problems. The idea of making people’s problems go away, even temporarily, makes me feel really good. The world can certainly be a very shitty place, and to be able to distract people from that fact makes me proud. Lately, however, I’ve realized that I can do better. I can do better than to consider myself a success for slowly committing suicide with drugs and alcohol while frequently getting naked, urinating everywhere, stapling my genitals, and vomiting so much that doctors gasp at the sight of my esophagus. Only those of you who have been devoted enough to me as fans to read what I write on the Internet even know that I have any intelligence whatsoever. I think a great many of you, as well as all of those who truly love me, would agree that I have been selling myself incredibly short and can, indeed, do much better. I feel like there are a bunch of people out there who look up to me for bad reasons, because I became successful for being an alcoholic drug addict that hurt myself a lot to amuse others. I am not saying that I will stop hurting myself to amuse people, I still have major mortality issues. What I am saying, however, is what drives me to achieve sobriety is the idea of giving people a chance to look up to me for good reasons. I have come to believe, absolutely, i the fact that our consciousness continues to evolve after our present bodies are deceased, and the importance of living a good life is greater to me than I can express. I want to make this world a better place and have chosen to do so by living what I consider to be a good life. I wish to lead by example, which is why I no longer contribute to the suffering of animals. I will not eat or wear any parts of the bodies of dead animals (correction: I eat fish). I could make a list of the things I choose to do, but, rther than do that, I will just leave you with the following statement: I am hopeful that I will make you all proud.
I Love You All,
Steve-O
P.S. Thank you all for supporting me the way you do...
April 1, 2008
The Chicken And The Egg
"What came first, the chicken, or the egg?" I believe
it is fairly obvious that this question is based on an
assumption that there must have been a beginning of
Time. I’ve thought about it before and arrived at the
conclusion that it is equally ridiculous to assume
that Time has a beginning and an end as it was for the
first people to take sail on the seas to fear falling
off the end of the world. The egg came from the
chicken and the chicken came from the egg, so, is it
not obvious that neither could have come first, and
that, just like the three dimensional world and
everything in it, Time is round and not linear? Many
of us believe that when we die everything ends for us.
This is simply not true. Our consciousness continues
to evolve after we leave this physical form. All you
have to do is take a cursory look into NDE’s (Near Death
Experiences) to find that people in deep comas have
been able to describe leaving their body, as well as
accurately describe the room their body was in, as
well as the details of the appearance of each
individual in that room. I encourage anyone with
doubts to look into it. The reason I am writing this
is because the idea of people believing that our
consciousness is not eternal (essentially, round)
bothers me. We have every reason to live good lives,
to strive rigorously for good karma. Prime Creator has
quite the sense of humor, Love is the only answer, and
Time will never run out,
nor will you fall off the end of it...
http://www.viddler.com/explore/Md0206/videos/1/
I Love You All,
Steve-O
March 31, 2008
Troubled Jackass Sinks To New Low
I am excited to say that I finally got to see the infamous
photos of me snorting drugs off that hot chick’s legs.
It turns out that they were taken hours after I was
informed that I wasn’t, in fact, going to be getting married. It’s
also very apparent, from just a glance at the photos, that that
hot chick had positioned her legs in such a manner
that really didn’t leave me many other options for places to
snort drugs from. I truly can’t remember a blink of it, not even vaguely,
but, it looked like the chick was hot as hell, and that
it’s just a plain drag that her face was blurred in
the photos. If anyone on this list knows her, please
extend to her my warmest thanks, it seemed to me like
we were getting along famously. I don’t consider those
photos to be very damaging to me at all, at least not
compared to my "Crack Cocaine" video.
By the way, US Weekly, I’ve never actually smoked
crack before, that was PCP I was smoking in that
video. Now, it’s time to move on to the most damaging
material of all, at least the most damage my nose has
sustained as a result of any single isolated incident.
For all of the geniuses that write all of the witty
articles in the press, I’ve actually taken the liberty
to craft my own headlines for the stories that are
sure to come from the following clip:
"Fallen Television Star Sinks To New Low With Shoelace":
"Troubled Jackass Finds Humor In Uni-Nostril":
"Steve-O’s Tragic Decline Leads To Threading Nose With Shoestring":
..
http://www.jackassworld.com/blog/2008/03/31/steve-o-and-the-shoestring/
I Love You All,
Steve-O
March 29, 2008
Damaging Material
I keep reading in the press about "damaging
photographs" which were taken of me before I decided
to get clean. I wonder what the geniuses who write
articles in the media will find more damaging, alleged
photos of me snorting white powder, footage I
personally put out of myself with white powder caked
all over my nostrils (which garnered over a million
views on YouTube in just over a week), or the footage
Johnny Knoxville filmed of me yesterday. I’m not even
going to say what Johnny filmed me doing yesterday,
but, I will say two things. It will certainly "get ’em
talking", and, I changed my mind, I’m not saying
anything else. Ha ha ha ha ha!!! Thanks again for
pulling me off the bench, Johnny! Oh yeah, to the rest
of my dear jackass family, if any of you wise guys
come up with any plans to not leak the footage Johnny
filmed yesterday, I’ll have you know that I will
definitely do it again. And it will hurt me. No reason
to lock me up for that threat, I’m already locked up!
Ha ha ha ha ha!!! I love you all,
Steve-O
P.S. Like I said, the entire, 51-minute-long,
completely uncensored"Making Of The Album DVD",
is available as a free bonus dvd with the purchase of
"Steve-O: The Dumbest Asshole In Hip-Hop"
at www.steveo.com (shipping is free in the USA).
Here’s how it begins:
http://www.ballbagmedia.com/videos/waytoohottrailer.mov
March 27, 2008
Something I Do Not Appreciate
I have always been a very candid individual,
especially when it comes to the media. There is no
reason, and never has been any reason, for the press
to write stuff about me that is not true. The stories
that are circulating right now about me being at some
party hitting on random girls and asking to snort
drugs from their breasts are not true at all. I will
be the first to admit that I’ve snorted all kinds of
drugs, in all sorts of situations, but I take offense
to claims that I was running around hitting on random
women at a time when I was under the impression that I
was engaged to be married. I know many of you who are
in receipt of this message from me work in the media,
and I would greatly appreciate it if you would squash
this dishonest journalism. These stories are so
untrue, they place me at a party hitting on women when
I was locked up in the looney bin. I’m a tough guy,
with very thick skin, but that doesn’t mean I take
kindly to being lied about, especially when it comes
to behavior that took place after I asked someone to
marry me and before I was informed, by the girl I
asked to marry me, that she had completely changed her
mind about getting married. Feel free to write
whatever you want about me being rejected by my
fiance, because that is true, but, please, don’t lie
about me. I like to consider myself to be exciting
enough that dishonesty is not required to get a story
out of me. Thanks, I love you all,
Steve-O
P.S. My mixtape, Steve-O: The Dumbest Asshole In
Hip-Hop, is scorching-hot in the streets right now,
and available at www.steveo.com. It comes with the
51-minute long, completely uncensored, "Making Of The
Album DVD", which Universal Records absolutely hates.
Please piss off Universal Records by buying my
mixtape, shipping is free in the USA...
March 21, 2008
It’s Time To Stop Lying And Cheating...
It’s time to stop doing anything that you don’t want
everyone, and I mean, literally, everyone, to know
that you have done. Call it a hunch, but, I believe
that the time for us humans to be seeing through only
two eyes and thinking with individual minds is
EXTREMELY limited (i.e. only until 2012, when the Age
Of Aquarius Begins). Here is something that I just
read on the Internet while doing Higher Power research
for rehab:
"The Age of Aquarius, or water-bearer, in their
opinion, marks the time when the collective
consciousness of Mankind will be elevated and the
esoteric knowledge of God will be made available to
all humankind. Then and only then, according to that
belief, the new "Golden Age of Aquarius" will begin
anew, and the "New Heaven and New Earth" will begin."-
Wikipedia
Now I would like to share a very entertaining video
clip, loaded with bullshit about religion, but
perfectly factual with regards to astrology. I believe
that all of the research any of you care to do will
support my belief that the astrological end of this
extremely entertaining video is completely correct.
About the paradigm shift of 2012, if I’m wrong, that’s
fine with me, after all, I’m bipolar, with manias for
days! I’m just saying, "be real careful, don’t
misbehave, that’s all you gotta know to be Saved!"...
check out 2012, and, here’s the astrology video:
http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=5216975979627863972
Night! Night! I Love You All...
Steve-O
March 20, 2008
You Should All Know I Am In Rehab
A) HOW I GOT INTO ALCOHOL AND DRUGS
1) Mom was very alcoholic, and I feel that is a gross
understatement. I’d love to say that I first took to
alcohol out of affection for my mother (there was
never any shortage of that for me) but I think the
truth is that I was always powerless over it. I know I
was always powerless over alcoholism, because it had
such a grip on Mom’s adulthood and my childhood, and I
never chose to fight it. Until now. Dad was a
corporate executive whose job required the family to
travel the world fairly extensively and both Mom and
Dad were quite self conscious of how they were
perceived by others. We were frequently on airplanes
and, before Mom and Dad would find themselves in the
embarrassing position of being caught by other
passengers with a crying baby, I was fed alcohol.
Obviously I don’t have recollections from the time
when I was a baby, so this account is pieced together
from vague memories of being told stories that are
similar or exactly the same. Mom’s alcoholism truly
reared its ugly head when I was eight and nine years
old, it was in 1983 that she lied to the family about
having lymph node cancer so that she would have an
explanation for staying in bed drunk at all hours. I
forgave my Mom very easily for her act of dishonesty,
my love for her was unconditional. At this point in my
life I find myself hoping that I will be able to
forgive myself for similarly selfish acts that my own
addiction led me to commit. I can’t believe I just
called out my own dead Mom for what’s surely the worst
lie she ever told. I also can’t believe I ever picked
up my first drink on my own after the way alcohol
ruined her life. God, I miss my Mom. I think I was
eight years old when I was introduced to the family
tradition of children partaking in an alcoholic
beverage of their choice, just one, only on New Year’s
Eve, each year. I think it was right away that I knew
I wasn’t interested in beer, rather that I wanted
scotch whiskey. I can’t really remember, after all,
what alcoholic remembers the first drink they picked
up. The first time I vomited from truly drinking "too
much" alcohol, I was twelve years old, that I’m quite
sure of. I’m also quite sure that everything I
remember taking interest in from childhood, and
onwards, I poured myself into with an unhealthy
"excessive/compulsive" attitude about it. Baseball.
Heavy metal music. Skateboarding. Drinking. Drugs. Oh
yeah, and the video camera...
2) I didn’t first try marijuana (it was actually hash
the first time) because I randomly bumped into it. I
tried it because I had made a decision to find it. I
tried it again the day after that, as I recall, and, I
believe the next day as well. Overnight, when I had
just turned sixteen years old, I became a
"stoner/druggie." Shortly thereafter, I was taking LSD
on a regular basis. It was my prerogative to try just
about any drug I could get my hands on. It is not my
intention to glorify my history as a drug abuser with
elaborate stories about having sex in lavatories on
airplanes after snorting amphetamines off the toilet
at the tender age of seventeen. I will simply say that
when I was interviewed about it all upon checking into
this rehab facility, it became frighteningly clear to
me how lucky I am to still have any chance whatsoever
at leading a happy, fulfilling, and meaningful life. I
am so lucky, there is no doubt in my mind that I have
a Higher Power that is incredibly interested in me
succeeding.
B) ATTEMPTS TO CONTROL MY ALCOHOL/DRUG USE
1) The first time I made an effort to stop drinking,
because I was an alcoholic, I was eighteen years old.
I recall looking up Alcoholics Anonymous, but not
making it to any meetings, and after, perhaps (I can’t
remember exactly), nineteen days of not drinking, back
to back, doing the same number of vodka shots back to
back. Mom forced me into a rehab facility when I was
twenty years old (she was sober at the time, I was in
jail, and going to rehab was my only chance to see
sunlight before court). Sobriety lasted for two and a
half months after the sun’s rays met my face, and it
ended as brutally as it had when I was eighteen.
2) Although I mentioned amphetamines, and can’t say
that I’ve not accepted them on numerous occasions
(especially in pill form), I’ve never purchased them
(correction-bought the pills once) or sought them out
when I wasn’t aware of their immediate presence. I’ve
never smoked crack before (despise the fictitious rap
song I wrote about smoking crack), but, powder cocaine
is an entirely different story. I have been aware of
significant problems that snorting powder cocaine has
caused in my life for many years now, and, on numerous
occasions, made efforts to give up the habit, with
varied success. The longest I was able to abstain was
one year and six days, the second longest was roughly
six months, and, you get the idea.
C) ABUSIVE BEHAVIOR
1) The abusive behavior that I feel will haunt me for
the rest of my life can be summed up by the words
"verbal and emotional attacks on my loved ones." As
I’ve expressed before for this behavior, and only this
behavior, I fear punishment by my Higher Power.
2) I have done a great deal to damage my mind and
body. Like I said, I am beyond fortunate to have this
chance at salvaging a happy, fulfilling, and
meaningful life. My luck will not last with continued
use of alcohol and drugs that are not prescribed to me
by doctors that are aware of my addictions.
D) SPIRITUAL ISSUES
1) I believe that I was chosen by my Higher
Power/Guardian Angels, and led to the spiritual path
which I am currently on. I try not to ask of God,
rather, to work for what it is I want, and communicate
with God only in "Thank You’s." For my Higher Power I
am more grateful than I could possibly express.
2) I used to consider myself agnostic, as recently as
September of 2006. I now consider myself, well,
"spiritual," actually, let me say, "Thankful..."
E) EFFECTS ON FAMILY, SIGNIFICANT OTHERS, FRIENDS
1) I’ve already covered the communication problems
with family members and expressed that I fear
punishment for such problems.
2) I’ve communicated to you all before that I , fairly
recently got on both knees and proposed marriage to a
girlfriend, in front of her Grandma. I also
communicated that she later expressed that she
completely changed her mind about getting married. Now
I am in recovery and do not have a significant other.
My friends are still my friends, but also understand
that my health requires that I not be around drugs and
alcohol.
F) EMOTIONAL PROBLEMS
1) I do not have poor self esteem or anxiety issues.
2) While I do have guilt issues related to past
behavior, I am too excited about my future behavior
and the prospect of becoming a healthy parent to let
them remain an obstacle.
G) WORK PROBLEMS
1) I’ve never had problems making it to work or
getting paid--the nature of my work almost embraced my
addictions.
2) There were jobs that I showed up to in absolutely
horrible shape, and some of them ended prematurely due
to that fact.
H) FINANCIAL PROBLEMS
1) I have no financial problems.
2) I have no second financial example.
I) CONSEQUENCES OF BEHAVIOR
1) While under the influence of drugs and alcohol, my
behavior is so impossible to predict, it is
unbelievable. I don’t know where to begin, anyone who
has known me for so much as a couple of months, shit,
even the police offices who arrested me this month can
tell you that I’ve got to be the craziest mutherfukker
they’ve ever laid eyes on.
2) Really, I’m not trying to "toot my own horn," it’s
time for me to "hang up my hat," to "throw in the
towel," it’s time for me to "call it quits."
J) PREOCCUPATION WITH CHEMICALS
1) I haven’t mentioned nitrous oxide, the drug I
"fiend" for, by far, the most. I used to inhale this
gas by the cartridge, specifically, by the case (a
case containing 600 cartridges). I would call a taxi
to come bring me, to pick up a case, and be searching
under my mattress for cartridges while awaiting its
arrival. When it did arrive, I would bring my
cartridge dispenser in the taxi and be dispensing the
gas into my lungs for the entire ride home from the
pick-up. When I say that I feel I was chosen by
Guardian Angels, I say that quite literally. I had a
number of not-at-all-subtle experiences that indicated
to me that I had to give up the nitrous oxide, and
did, six months ago.
2) Another drug that I haven’t mentioned is ketamine.
It is also a drug that I had not-at-all-subtle
experiences on. Enough said.
A GOODBYE LETTER TO MY DRUGS OF CHOICE
At this point,
All you fucking things are good for is dying. I’m not
ready to die. I’m ready to live. I’m ready to breathe
(properly, even). I’m ready to fall in love. I’m ready
to become ready to start a family. I’m ready to be
happy, fulfilled and meaningful. Maybe I’ll see you
fukkers if and/or when I’m ready to die.
Steve-O
March 18, 2008
Trying To Look My Best While I’m At My Worst
Pretty wild to wait until you’re hidden away in the
"nut house" to become self-conscious about the way you
look. But here I am, with "Mint Julep Masque" caked
onto my face, with hopes that it will tone down the
wrinkles that have set into my skin. Each morning I
join my fellow looney tunes in filing into our
"activity room" for our "grooming group." When I first
sat down to treat myself to a shave, I felt
unfortunate to be peering into the magnifying side of
the portable make-up mirror that was issued to me for
the session. I had never seen the toll that my years
have taken on my flesh so vividly. At first, I was
genuinely upset, especially for noticing all of the
grey hairs that the magnifying mirror revealed. I
spoke up about it to another patient, a man to my
left, named Barker. He is a lawyer who came to the
ward because he attempted suicide by slashing his arms
and wrists, so severely that they are currently held
together with sutures and staples. Barker is a great
guy. I can’t possibly imagine how such a sensible man
could find life to be not worth living. I said
something to Barker about how, even though it is hard
to realize the gross imperfection my years have led
to, that I wouldn’t trade them in for anything, Barker
did not hesitate for a second before stating, "It’s
not like you could, even if you wanted to..." Our
conversation quickly turned to a discussion of notable
movie stars who became increasingly successful,
despite "deterioration of appearance." The best
example we spoke of, in my opinion, was Robert
Redford. After all, not only did he co-star in that
movie with the younger and more attractive Brad Pitt,
but, I believe he directed, produced, wrote, or all of
the above, and, all by himself, as well, and that’s
with deeper wrinkles than Jack Nicholson and Robert
DeNiro put together! After my conversation with
Barker, at lunch, he came up to me and said something
about me finding "the right role" in a movie, and
becoming the next Humphrey Bogart. I still maintain
that I am far too proud of being myself to wish to
pretend to be another person, so, pursuing a
mainstream acting career, at least for the time being,
is out of the question (HAHAHA!!! I’m in the looney
bin!!! Of course it’s out of the question!!!). I am,
indeed, very proud to be exactly who I am,
imperfections and all. As a matter of fact, I look
forward to the deterioration of my appearance over
future years, with hopes of giggling, in old age, at
the thought of how truly ugly I will have become.
Speaking of "ugly" check out the brush with the law
that went down after I forgot to teach Big Regg how to
juggle:
I Love You All,
Steve-O
March 14, 2008
Just When You Thought This Week Couldn’t Get Wilder
I have very frequently expressed that I look up, very
much, to Ozzy Osbourne, because of the fact that I
feel he was "deliberately misunderstood." I believe
that it is endlessly interesting how I perceive the
"Price of Darkness" to have "seen the light." Ozzy’s
first album, "Blizzard of Oz" is an absolute
masterpiece, in my opinion. If you ask me, all answers
to religious questions can be found in the lyrics to
the song "I Don’t Know," from that very album. The
insight of Ozzy Osbourne is immeasurable, the way I
see it. I, also, strive to be misunderstood.
I have been on a spiritual mission and, gradually,
have come to realize that I have a deeper agenda in
this life than to make people giggle at my random acts
of silliness, such as breaking bones and shoving
things up my butt. There is more to me than the act of
scrotum-stapling. Believe it or not, the only "A" I
got during my brief stint as a student at University
of Miami was in Philosophy. The Greek philosophers,
Plato, Aristotle, and Socrates, all predated the birth
of Jesus Christ by over five hundred years and
established that matter does not exist (barring our
perception of it) and that we are all nothing more
than the imaginations of ourselves. With a proper
understanding of this reality, it is possible to
imagine dimensions beyond the three in which we feel
trapped. Before being committed to the "funny farm" I
only contemplated the 4th and 5th dimensions. My idea
of the 4th dimension was of a place where Time is not
linear and everyone is confronted by the actions of
themselves and everyone else-good and bad. In the 4th
dimension, I pictured every cheating wife/husband
joining in witnessing their infidelity with their
spouse, everyone bearing witness to every selfish act
ever committed and every selfless act as well. With
this in mind, I had pictured the 5th dimension to be
something of a "VIP room." It turns out that there is
no such thing as coincidence ("That is for damn
sure..." -NLR) and I came to this psychiatric ward to
find out (from fellow pescetarian, NLR) that "The
Agenda" is "deep." There are, actually, no less than
nine dimensions. Of course, I don’t want to get too
heavy with "dimension talk." For those of you that are
interested in hearing from entities that exist in
other dimension, I present you with the word:
"Pleiadians."
For those of you who want to hear a filthy rap song I
recorded with Big Regg after I forgot to teach him how
to juggle, here you go:
"The Gutter Lane"
http://www.ballbagmedia.com/mp3/GuttaLane.mp3
Also, keep in mind, there is PLENTY more footage from
that day (when I woke up behind bars) and it includes
another awesome brush with the law that I still can’t
believe.
I Love You All,
Steve-O
March 13, 2008
You Should All Know I’m In The Looney Bin
"They call it "code 5150," that means "psycho,"
legally, fuckin bat-shit, certifiably. I’m outta my
mind, believe-you-me. How’d I get this way? How can
this be? It’s gotten so bad there’s nothing left of
me." -Steve-O
Those words were written during a "low." Before the
day when Johnny Knoxville, Jeff Tremaine, Big Regg,
Swizz, Rick Kosick, Dimitry Elyaschevich, Cordell
Mansfield, and Trip Taylor came to my home and,
physcially, forced me into the hospital (where I was
placed on a 5150 "hold’), I had thought of "bipolar"
as a "good" thing. I rationally deduced that, with our
time in this life being so limited, it was productive
to stick to nothing but extremely high "highs", and
extremely low "lows." ANYTHING but to "crash on the
rocks of mediocrity." I figured that, since I am an
extraordinarily "tough" individual, I could handle it,
and my legacy would be comprised of only that which
could be described as "intense." After four days in a
psychiatric ward (a.k.a. "looney bin," a.k.a.
"cuckoo’s nest") it has dawned on me that a great
deal of what I produced, while on narcotics-induced
"highs," was a bunch of manic bullshit that made
little-to-no sense and, furthermore, was devastating
to those who love me the most. At this point, I am no
longer "5150-status" (which was the three-day "hold"
on me, resulting from suicidal behavior). I am now
"5250-status" (which means that the "hold" has been
extended to 14 days, for the exact same reasons). I’m
not getting out of this "insane asylum" any time in
the immediate future, so, I’m going to learn as much
from the experience as possible. So far, I’ve figured
out that I did a great deal of damage to my brain by
abusing drugs and, now that they’ve all worn off, I’m
facing the consequences. I suppose it is an ironic
"eye for an eye" situation that I am in, coping with
the lowest "lows" that I’ve ever experienced-as a form
of punishment for the emotional distress that I have
put my loved ones through with the self-destructive
behavior that led me here.
I already know that I will be handing these pages over
to my beautiful assistant, Jen Moore, during our next
visitation, and instructing her to share them with as
many people as possible on the Internet (rather than
try to sell a "juicy" story to the tabloid press for
profit). I hope that I haven’t disappointed too many
of my fans. Actually, ya know what? Anyone that is
disappointed by any of these words really doesn’t
matter to me. I’ve harmed myself to no end for those
people (at the expense of my loved ones), and look
where it got me.
Now, what do I have to add? The research I did into
the immortality of the soul, the end of life in our
current bodies, and the 4th dimension, was, by no
means a bunch of bullshit. I could stand before you
all and say very similar words.
Remember, everyone,
"Be real careful, don’t misbehave...
That’s all you gotta know to be saved..."
-me
I Love You All,
Steve-O
P.S. I’m really in the looney bin, but I think it was
TJ that read my mind. Is that right, are you TJ? Maybe
I’m wrong...
March 2, 2008
bad news, for many...
I remember, one day in 1996, trying to read the bible
with an open mind. I couldn't get past the first page,
I recall being revolted by the idea that I was
supposed to believe that God just said, "Let There Be
Light", and then the Sun and Universe Came Into
Existence. Turns out that that is exactly what
happened.
God was alone in the dark, and thought that that
sucked. Then God started to giggle at the thought of a
way to be amused, and improve at the same time. God
began to laugh, harder and harder, as the thought
turned into a real plan. "What If I Let Every Cell In
My Body Think, As Individuals, Each, That It's Name
Was ME?", God thought, laughing, harder than ever.
"This Is Going To Be Great! I'll Put Every Cell In My
Body To The Ultimate Test, Each One Will Think For
Itself!" And God said, "Let There Be Light!"
So, here we are, and God is testing us. Our strongest
instinct is to survive, and we know we are going to
die. I always thought that our very existence was a
cruel prank on us. Now I know that it is a test.
I don't like to refer to God as a He or a She, and
certainly not as an It. God is what ever you want to
name God, and any religion can work for you, as long
as you know to be Good. This will all come as horrible
news for those "people of God" who do things that they
know are wrong, and think that they have been "getting
away with it". My name is Steve-O, my nation is "The
World", and my religion is "To Do Good".
We are accountable for everything that we do, say, or
even think, and all the activity we are responsible
for is eternal, and waiting for us to answer to it—-
In the Fourth Dimension. Time. We are not in the
Fourth Dimension yet, we don't get there until we die.
For now, we are, essentially, "glued down", which is
why can still be foolish enough to believe that Time
is linear. When we die, we become "un-glued" and float
as one, in everything we've ever done. Ever heard of
"Your Life Flashing Before Your Eyes?" Now, I ask of
you, what's the worst thing you ever did?
I Love You All,
Steve-O
February 29, 2008
One Hellacious Feb. 29th,,, A...K...A... LEAP YEAR!!!
Considering That I Had an "extra" Day On My Hands, You
Know... February 29th, The 366th Day Of Each Fourth
Year, and, Since The Number 4 Is Known To "some" As
"unlucky"--- I DECIDED ON HAVING GOOD LUCK!!! Hell, My
Bro, Bryan Gillooly, The Former National Diving
Champion Of The USA, Was Born On Leap Year, And He's
Always Been Very Fortunate--- Talk About "THE FOUNTAIN
OF YOUTH"!!! Speaking Of Youth, "Biblical Jesus" Will
Soon Have To Respect Me As His Elder, Unless, That Is,
He Really "Came Back" To Live Longer. No Disrespect TO
ANYONE, I'm Just Saying That, I'm Fixing To Make My
"Gods" Proud Of Me--- I've Decided On Outliving Jesus,
And Getting Higher Ratings Than Ozzy (and the rest of
the osbournes). Just To Be A Dickhead (I Mean
"House")--- I'm Gonna Go Ahead And Do Two Totally
Radical Things:
1. Skip The Boring Boardroom Meeting, And, Very
Simply, "demand my own television series on mtv"...
2. Practically Cough Up The Answer To Yesterday's
"riddle", Because I Can't Recall Liking "riddles".
Here's An Idea Of How My "Clock" Works=== All Of These
Fuckers (AND The "Miracle Mug", AND "One For The
Riddler") Went Down On February 29th:::---!!!LEAP
YEAR!!!---:::
"Whose Pussy Shall I Eat To Get A Series On MTV???
Lauren Dolgen, Please, "Respondez Vouz, Sil Vous
Plais", ASAP!!! "The Boss Cracker" Wants To Know!!!
Specifically, I Challenge You To Even Try To Deny That
THE OSBOURNES DON'T HAVE SHIT ON BALLBAG INC. For
Proof That This Is The Case, And, To Make You Happy.
Really, For All The Money I Threw Around, I Did All Of
That For Fun, And, Didn't Spend A Dime. Here's How You
Make "One Plus One Equal Three", Fuck A Pilot, I'll
Just Serve You The Whole First Season For Free!!! You
Know I Can Do It Too, Remember How GREG KAPLAN Saved My
"Making Of" Show--- AND HANDED IT BACK TO DICKHOUSE
ALL NICE AND READY TO PLAY ON MTV!!! Take Over Is Now
Complete. Time To Get Back To Work... What Did You Do
Yesterday, And, Are You Ready For A Day Like That To
End??? NOT ME!!! Woohoo!!! Love You All,
Steve-O
February 29, 2008
One For The Riddler...
MIRACLES ARE GOING DOWN--- LEFT AND RIGHT!!!
Look When The MAGIC Below Happened... Is That The
Correct Time?Or... NOT? I Can't Say... If I Did, All
Of Our Clocks Might Match!!!
Fri, 29 Feb 2008 16:24:58 -0800
Love You All,
Steve-O
February 29, 2008
Dear Family...
Dear Family,
We, all of us, are being "tested" by God. This is a
fact. I am a Good Man. My Religion Is To Do Good. My
Nation Is The World. God Is One. I really mean it when
I say that the only fear I have is of being punished
for the way I my deliberate actions have made my Loved
Ones worry. I remember thinking that Life was a prank
on us, that our existence was inherently malicious,
because of awareness that it will end. The only A that
I earned during my first year at university was in
Philosophy. I got a kick out of the fact that we have
such a strong case to argue that matter does not exist
at all, that only imaginations exist. There is only
one time I recall you saying to me, "That is a good
question"-- when I asked how anyone could be "saved"
before the birth of Jesus. That is one of my Top Three
Proudest Moments. I used to think that any God that
indiscriminately doled out terminal illness to babies,
and bed sores to virtuous women, would have to have
"clocked out", be an asshole, or not exist. Not true.
I also used to believe that it would be arrogant to
assume that, in the Big Picture, that we are all
important enough to warrant a "judge and jury", but,
again, I was wrong. We are completely accountable for
our actions. All of them. I recently visited my
childhood friend, Abdalla, and asked him how he could
possibly interpret the suffering that Mom endured for
her last five years and he said, those of us who are
good, that know right from wrong, get tested the
hardest. That is considerably beyond harsh. I would
like to believe that our senses are easily manipulated
and that Mom only suffered in OUR minds, to light a
major fire under our asses. I was close to Mom and we
found joy in the shittiest of times. The last time Mom
really laughed was when she saw the words "shit" and
"fuck" freshly tattooed knuckles", she repeated both
words many times, and that is simply a great memory.
Mom had a "do not resuscitate" order on her bed that
day, and we still found something to laugh about. That
is amazing. I believe that the "meaning of life" is as
simple as picking one, and that the "purpose of life"
is to have lived the life you want to be proud of when
it ends. Laughing beats the shit out of crying, and
ambition is exponentially preferable to fear. I
remember the first time I asked you, "How scared of
death are you?" being a long time ago, and remember
you sharing your belief that some of us are fearful to
the very end, while others arrive peacefully. Death is
nothing to be afraid of, think about it, Dad, if being
dead sucked, then EVERYBODY'S SCREWED! I believe in
Quality Of Life and hate the idea of us both losing
ANY of it to fear or pessimism, when neither are
necessary. I've been really working my ass off to be a
good thing that happened in this world, and the "good
out-weighing the bad" doesn't satisfy me. I want
everything to be good. I can't imagine anyone who has
kicked more ass than me, and I'm just getting started.
I've run out of ideas to appease and comfort you-- I
went to every doctor there is, just for you, and made
those rounds three times in the last year and a half,
only to be told that I'm perfectly healthy. I went to
a psychiatrist, for no reason other than to improve
your Quality Of Life, and, literally, "If it's not
broken, don't fix it." I want you and Cindy to be in
my life, but, I see very transparently that neither of
you are "getting me". I am MISUNDERSTOOD FOR A
LIVING-- I BLATANTLY MOCK MORTALITY. We've got for
ever to be dead, and I never planned on letting that
fact bother me. It's like this, Dad, when there are
too many fans wanting photos to deal with, I think of
a day when nobody wants photos anymore, and it becomes
a JOY to be mobbed. When anything sucks, I turn it
into fun, one way or another. Remember, MY KNUCKLES!!!
You raised me to call it
the way I see it. This is how I see it, Viacom tried
to sue YouTube for Internet content, AND LOST. I don't
understand how you found a way to discourage me from
SPREADING JOY BY GIVING KICK ASS FOOTAGE AWAY TO MY
FANS FOR FREE ON THE INTERNET. That's what made me
write this, and, it had to be this long, so that I
could be over with it. You sold tobacco for a living,
which causes cancer. Joyousness is the only proven
cure of cancer, and I sell what I sell. I love you,
Dad, that's why I'm so adamant that you lighten up!
Steve
February 28, 2008
Welcome, To MY "SUPER SUPREMELY RAD E-MAIL LIST"
I Believe That We Are All Supposed To Be In THIS LIFE
Together, ALL OF US, AS ONE-- TO IMPROVE IT!!! I
Promised My Family That I Would Try My Best To Make
The World A Better Place, That's Why There Is A New
Sheriff In Town, AND I AM A MAN OF MY WORD. Please,
Watch, And Enjoy The Clip Below...
From Jen Moore:
I love this one! That guy was great! Thanks for
kicking so much ass Greg! Way to get the footage,
Steve!
February 27, 2008
Steve-O Goes Religious... Really!!!
I Wrote The Raddest E-Mail Of My Life Yesterday. And
Nikki Sixx BITCHED ABOUT IT. Man, Nikki, STOP BEING AN
ASSHOLE. I'm Going Religious On Your Ass Now... Enjoy!
Love You ALL,
Steve-O
February 26, 2008
The Raddest E-Mail I’ve Ever Written...
I've Got An IDEA! I Think It's Fantastic! Get Paid To
Give Away Footage That Is DRASTIC!!! O-Footage For
Free? That Sounds Like MAGIC!!! We Neeeeeeedddd To
Call Annie-- And Brag About It-- That's What I Say, We
Are Gonna Do It OUR OWN FUCKIN WAY!!! Every Fucking
Day, We We'll THROW A CLIP AWAY! FOR WHICH MY FANS DO
NOT HAVE TO PAY! Take That>>> Gene Simmons, Turns Out
THAT YOU ARE NOT THE MAN, I Have Got Love For My Fans,
You only care about dollars and scams... Your Art Is A
Sham!!! Thing is, I'm no idiot either, I figured out
how to get paid for giving shit away for FREE, TO MY
MySpace FAMILY! Now, I Announce, And, VERY PROUDLY,
That My Free Shit Will Now Download Quickly!
WOOOOOHOOOOO!!! That's It, From Here On Out, I Really
Love What I'm Talkin' About, I AM IN THE ZONE --WHERE
I DON'T SPEAK-- I SHOUT!!! So, It's jackassworld vs.
BallBag Inc., I SEE, AND THAT IS FUCKIN' FINE WITH ME,
so, let's begin to count money, I get paid from all
THIS SHIT, AND I THINK THAT IS SSSSSSSSSSOOOOOOOOOOO
SSSSSSSSSOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
FFFFFUUUUUNNNNNNYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Jen, now,
I leave it to you, and, With Full Faith, I Put My
Trust In You... haha.... BallBag Inc. FUCKIN RULES!!!
Before I Drop This HOT NEW CLIP, Here's Gene Simmon's
Personal Cell Phone Number, Man, If I Wasn't Married,
Your Hot, Underage Daughter Would Be My Fluffer!!!
HAHAHAHA!!! I Won't EVEN Say How I Got Your Number,
Let Alone So Damn Quick, Just, Please, EVERYONE-- Call
Gene Simmons, TELL HIM TO SUCK MY DICK!!! TURNS OUT
MANIC IS THE SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!~!~!:
Gene Simmons Cell Number: 1 310 446 0235
...I now COMMAND YOU-- DO NOT watch this clip-- unless
you've already called gene simmons-- and told him, (or
left a message),
"Steve-O Says You Can SUCK HIS DICK" HAHAHHAH
AHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHA (Karma is an UGLY BITCH, Really,
Call gene, BEFORE YOU WATCH THIS CLIP!!!!!!
Oh yeah, I'm back in LA, and the cops got me, RIGHT
AWAY!!!
I have left no reasonable doubt, that I am what
Hollywood's talkin about, now, I become another
Angel... to make gene pout:
1 888 446 0235
Love You ALL,
Steve-O
February 26, 2008
I Gave Howard Stern What He Loves...
This morning on Howard Stern, I probably really upset
a lot of people, well, I definitely did. Every time I
go to see Howard, I RAISE THE BAR. Howard loves
controversy, I slaughtered MANY "sacrificial lambs"
for Howard (the "Body Snatcher"), and treated myself
to a plug for each on. Sorry, if this upsets you, but,
right before I went there, I told you, "Now I gotta go
hand Howard's ass to him. " Everyone else that this
upsets, go ahead and understand that Dad raised me to
"call it the way I see it"... I'm not sorry for shit,
and I don't give a fuck about anyone's "legal
department", listen close, and, enjoy! Thanks,
Howard!!!:
Howard Stern 2/25/08:
http://www.ballbagmedia.com/mp3/stern022508.mp3
Now, lot's of people heard that, but, not many people
are watching MTV AT 2AM, so, I proudly bring you the
first "Ressurection":
Yo MTV Raps 1:
The "Second Ressurection" is UN-FUCKING BELIEVABLE, I
LOVE IT:
Yo MTV Raps w/ Beavis & Butthead:
Now, because I worked SO FUCKING HARD TO MAKE MY RAP
PROJECT A MONSTER, here's my message to many people on
this list, AND, THE PRESIDENT OF UNIVERSAL RECORDS:
Message to Andrew & Sylvia:
Love you all,
Steve-O
February 25, 2008
Why I Am "Dirty Jesus"...
Ol' Dirty Bastard was "Baby Jesus" Because He Squashed
Welfare Checks.
I'm "Dirty Jesus" Because I Squashed The "N-Bomb",
Really, I Did, Check It Out, This Is A Top Of The Line
Production, Hell, It's The Beginning Of A New Era:
Love You All,
Steve-O
February 24, 2008
My Reason For "Big and Rob" Beef...
Those two, at some point, stole my director, OUR
Jackass Director, Jeff Tremaine. I can't thank you,
and Knox, enough for letting me rule, but, I can give
you something to "beam about":
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IBR-Cds-IW8
Love you all,
Steve-O
P.S. I'm so stoked we all got together to BRING BACK
BIG BROTHER!!! LOVE YOU, DAVE CARNIE!!!
P.P.S. For the love of skateboarding,
listen to what I did with Jayne Deaux!
Welcome to the team, baby!!!
February 22, 2008
Horrible News for Rob & Big
http://www.ballbagmedia.com/videos/bigreg1.mov
February 21, 2008
UH OH...
LISTEN REAL CLOSE TO WHAT ME AND BREED SAY... BE REAL
CAREFUL...DON'T MISBEHAVE... THAT'S ALL YOU GOTTA KNOW
TO BE SAVED... LET ME PUT IT THIS WAY... MY ALBUM'S
BUDGET JUST SKYROCKETED TODAY... I JUST PULLED 2PAC
OUTTA THE GRAVE... TO LISTEN TO THIS NOONE HAS TO
PAY!!! THERE'S A TRULY SPECIAL SONG ATTACHED...
"Spit On My Dick
Love You All,
Steve-O
P.S. Really, IT'S ALL OVER NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
P.P.S. I'll be there by ten, Knox!!!
February 20, 2008
Grandma Knows Best...
Always one to take credit for being a great guy, I
can't help but share the Wise words of my new
Grandmother. You can see her in the video clip below
Her words:
Dear Steve - this is for you as you are the one that
took it into your hands to visit.
Thank you for being so caring that you took the time
out of your busy schedule to visit an old lady to
alleviate her concerns about her beloved
grand-daughter. I could see by your actions how much
you care for Brittany and the way that you looked
after her during the trip.
I also noted the loving care you showed to the
children, Dillon, Chloe and Breena. By the time you
left you had them all over you. Dillon is immitating
you, Chloe watched how you handled the fans and Breena
smothered you with kisses. Even my dog loves you, he
seems depressed now that you are gone.
I only have one word of advice that I think you should
heed. I have told each of my sons this (don't know
how much attention they paid to it) but it is just a
word to the wise. Whenever you have a disagreement
with Brittany (and you will, you're both human) don't
say anything in the heat of the moment that you will
regret. Bite your tongue! My Mom and Dad would go
back to day one with their grievances and it made it
twice as bad.
Also, to this day I remember what Dick said to me in
anger that he didn't mean but I remember this better
than the loving things he said. Brian was a handful
at four and he was driving us to distraction. Dick
told him if he didn't straighten up he was going to
put him in a closet. (You can realize how far Brian
had driven him, Dick was a gentle man). This then
made me angry and I told him he would put that child
in a clost over my dead body. He replied, "That can
be arranged." So, word of advice, bite your tongue!
SO, again I want to take this opportunity to thank you
for your loving nature to all of us. You seemed to
absorb what was wrong and tried to make it right. For
this I love you and wish that you and Brittany have a
good life together.
Love to you both, Grandma
Here's the clip:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yyvFibXgN2k
And, here's how hot my Wife is:
http://www.brittanymcgrawonline.com
http://www.myspace.com/britt3031
Love you all,
Steve-O
February 18, 2008
How To Earn Two Hundred Thousand Dollars, Real Quick...
Hey Everyone,
Try to find dishonesty in this. I ain't no liar, and,
I could, very well, be the "Big Dick Drink Guy"! For
real, there is now a healthy soft drink/beverage that
promises to work like Viagra! Woohoo! It's called
"EXTENZE"!!! This link, that you now have the
exclusive opportunity to click on, is so FUCKING
GENIUS, it just might seal My "200K In One Day" deal!
Hell, with my agents in control of this clip, I'd say
we'll have that deal inked by the end of this week!
Now, without further ado, ENJOY!:
Love you all,
Steve-O
February 17, 2008
I Wasn’t Going To Do This...
It is beyond important to me that you guys, my
immediate family members, view the following two
clips, and not discuss them with others who are not in
this loop (Our "Circle Of Trust"). This may seem
crazy, but it has to be that way, you'll soon know
why, so, stick with me! Nobody can be taught or told
to really understand that "God" is the "Sum Of Life",
that we are "One", "Quidam", that each of us,
ultimately, are cells in the Body Of God. Very few of
us ever learn to Love the "Sum Of Life", as a Whole,
more than we love ourselves. Most people are crippled
morally, by selfishness, and fail "God's Test" by
doing wrong to others, purposely, to benefit
themselves. In other words, most people have no sense
of "One-Ness". The fail "God's Test". "Life" is that
very test/game. We were given the ability to make our
own decisions, and presented with temptation, powerful
temptation, to do wrong-- to care only about
ourselves. Shedding "egoism" leads to "God
Consciousness". In simple terms, I have experienced
"God", and I'm taking a very major risk by writing
about it. Secrecy must be enforced, and will, but
let's not make that require consequences-- "Angels"
(i.e. "Upper Forces") deliberately and proactively ensure that
secrecy is protected by forcing the "Enlightened" to exhibit
extremely disturbing behavior. To prevent the
"Godless" from knowing of the rewards that self-less
living can bestow upon the "God Conscious", the
"Enlightened" are forced to behave SO strangely that
NOBODY could possibly, ever believe their attempts to
describe it or share knowledge of it. It has been made
impossible to describe, however, I REALLY need you all
to pay very close attention to these two video clips:
And, I need the rest of the World to believe that I'm
nuts, or Angels will force me to use my Power to do
wrong. Big time. Love you lots, ALL OF YOU,
Steve
February 16, 2008
Valentines Day AKA The Worst Day Ever
Having worked to alleviate the suffering of animals for as long as I have, of course I can't sit in this conversation quietly! Steve-O, I've had the great pleasure of knowing you for about 2 years now. In that 2 years, you have worked closely with me to bring animal issues to the forefront- whether it be speaking out against circuses that abuse animals or posing in ad campaigns to speak out against the wretched fur industry which continues to anally electrocute and skin animals alive for their pelts.
Choosing to eat vegetarian, albeit a big lifestyle change, is the easiest thing an individual can do stop the suffering of animals on today's "modern day" factory farms. And it just happens to be great for the environment and for your health! Cows don't like to have their limbs chopped off without painkillers, pigs don't like to be castrated and skinned alive, and chickens don't like to have their throats slit and have their feathers removed in boiling water. While people are a lot different from farm animals in the sense that we have the capacity to make choices, they are the same as us in the sense that they have the capacity to want to live a life without pain and suffering.
The great news is, Steve-O, that if you're a fan of Burger King- you can still go! BK Veggie Burgers are the shit! I'm having vegan Big Mac's and BBQ rib sandwiches at my place next week so I'd love to have you over. You too, Big Regg!
Steve-O, thanks for continuing to make the World a better place for people and for the animals we share it with.
xo,
Michelle
You Can Open A Door For Someone...
...But You Can't Force Them To Choose To Walk Through It.
Before I inform you all that this e-mail will leave
you with the chance/challenge of reducing the World's
pain and suffering (read on, and you will "Get It"O,
let me tell you how my Valentine's Day went . I
woke up on February 14th feeling peculiarly, and
uncomfortably grumpy (i.e. counterproductive). As I realized it
was Valentine's day, "grumpy and counterproductive"
turned into "pissed the fuck off" -- because I
love my Wife EVERY DAY, and take, passionately,
offense to the idea of conformity (i.e. being told
that a calendar day, which is best known for MASSACRE,
requires MORE love, i.e. I'm being
accused of Loving my Wife throughout
every OTHER calendar day. Bullshit. Fuckin' A
Bull-Fuckin-Shit. Then I had had a fleeting, foggy daydream
about buying my Wife a diamond ring to represent our
"Cycle Of Love". Those thoughts, quickly, turned into
a "me v.s. me" debate over how an "I'm Married Ring"
from a 25 cent "temptation machine" that sits
near the exit of every "super" market, to test our
willingness to disrespect the body/property of God,
and mock our selfish materialsim, would be received by
my Wife . Then
I started thinking of how much it would cost to make
that diamond "real", and, immediately, it dawned on me
that my Love is Priceless. Fuck diamonds, and fuck
Valentine's day, for disrespecting the OTHER 364 days
of my Love love it's "supposed" to represent. Fuck Thanksgiving,
too, for making the "Godless" feel entitled to be ungrateful,
unappreciative, and, scoff at the OTHER 364 days that
we should ALL be EQUALLY Thankful for. To cleanse
myself of this cancerous grump-fest that our misguided, evil
"Holidays" forced on me, let me say, "Fuck Birthdays",
as well, for making us older then the OTHER 364 days
we didn't "Start Dying" on. And, Fuck "Colombus Day" for
glorifying greed, and genocide, for so much as one second, let
alone 24 hours. Fuck money, too, all it takes is five
minutes of researching Canada's books of history to
find out that George Washington was, easily, as evil
as the money his upon which his image is permanently
displayed. I retained that truth, about America's first
president, from my otherwise useless stint as a
student in seventh grade at a "rich kid school", in Toronto--
where every student wore a green blazer and a plaid
tie. Dad said that no kid in History, probably ever,
behaved so badly in such a school, let alone succeeded
in forcing the "Powers That Be" to let him drop out, only to
enroll in a public school where-- the word "education" fails
to pertain to it's existence. That place was worthless. I
like it when "Enlightened" people talk of regretting nothing they
ever did, except failing to drop out of junior
high school sooner (my Son curses himself for making
it through seventh grade-- I Praise
him for dropping out in the eighth). Education is very
different from "Learning". Now, it's time for everyone
to Learn something really, really important. You see,
as the 13th of February became
the 14th, I was immersed in researching the Meaning of
"Enlightenment", i.e. "God Consciousness". It first
struck me as a "bummer" when I realized that I cannot
eat the meat of an animal that
can feel pain and suffering, EVER AGAIN. Not just
mammals, birds are "off limits, too. That which
lives in the Sea is fine to eat. it's called
"Seafood" because, if you can See it, and capture it,
you can Eat It. For those of you thinking that makes
me a "hypocrite", remember what Jesus Saved The World
With: Bread And Two Fuckin Fish, Dude, So, There.
Sushi just started tasting much better and Soy
Burgers are "What's Up". If every Human walked through
this Door, we, together, would officially end famine.
That is Fact. Now, many of you are
probably thinking that I'm "crazy", or "manic", i.e.
suffering from some sort of "mental illness". Not
true, but, if ANY of you, EVER AGAIN, eat the CORPSE
of an animal that died in fear, pain, and suffering, you
will be swallowing shit that will not pass through
you, or ever be digested. You will be keeping evil,
depression, death, fear, anxiety, pain, suffering,
agony, and all kinds of other toxic shit-- FOREVER.
Now, for me to Open The Door for those of you that
didn't pull a "Tony Hawk" on these important words--
my Man, Ben Loka, is "Enlightened", to those who continue to eat
meat after witnessing the miniscule fraction of His
Wisdom, which is just a click on the link below away,
all I can say is, "You Are What You Eat, Pal, And, I
Wish You Well... In Fucking Hell":
Love you all, Really, ALL OF YOU,
Steve-O
P.S. Welcome to the "rad e-mail list", Ben, and check
out how cool being "bipolar" turned out to be!
Actually, I'll get to that later. Thanks for saving so
many animals, Ben, and, thanks to the "Massacre Day"
falling on the day that I promised to perform on stage
for PETA-- and announced that I chose to love every
animal and human on V-Day, not myself, or my desires.
I'm a fuckin veggie-vegan-I-don't-fuckin-know -what,
but, it feels Great!
February 14, 2008
Meet My New Comrade...
A rap artist that is, like me, signed to Universal Records-- Lil' Eazy. For those of you who know nothing about rap, Lil' Eazy is the son of the late, great Eazy-E. We just got off the phone and set the 26th day of this month to record "Suck My Dick, Bitch", a song about blowjobs saving the World. Now, I've heard back from Tommy Lee (NOT LARS, WHAT THE FUCK, LARS?), but he's out of town and I can't confirm his availability. If your guys' handlers, Tommy and Lars, are frowning on the idea of joining me and Lil' Eazy on this track, tell them that they are being disrespectful to the memory of Eazy-E, and, they're stupid, because my album has a track that I recorded with Fame to pay homage to the late, great ODB, I have another song I recorded with M.O.P., I have a song I recorded with B-Real to show respect to Cypress Hill, I have a song I recorded with Kool G Rap, I have a song with Daz and Kurupt (EVER HEARD OF THA DOGG POUND?), and I have another song with D Jukes. The producers of my album are Red Spyda, Apex, Fame, Jeekyman, Mike Nitty, TMon, and B-Real. My album is no fucking joke, and I need a famous drummer. So, those who handle me, please reach out to Travis Barker-- if Lars and Tommy both continue to flake out on me. The day this track gets recorded is the 26th of this month, and, it's going down. Let's stop slouching, everyone, because Lil' Eazy ain't no joke, and I want him on my album, with Big Regg, who was signed to Eazy's label, but never dropped-- because Eazy died. This song is meant to be, so, let's make it happen. Thanks. Also, check this out, Lil' Eazy, my music videos all kick ass, too. Universal doesn't like this, that's why I'm leaking it:
Love you all,
Steve-O
P.S. Check out www.steveo.com, Lil' Eazy, I believe it will get you very excited about my rap album. Really good talking to you, brutha...
February 13, 2008
Teaching My Son The Value Of Money...
You have to get a license to catch a fucking fish,
but, any old asshole can have kids, be shitty parents,
and the government even pays them cash bonuses for
each additional bastard child they have-- and neglect.
I believe in good parenting, that's why my Wife and I
adopted a Son. To teach him Values:
Love you all,
Steve-O
February 12, 2008
Now I’m Married With An Adopted Child...
Practically true, even though my Wife and I aren't
married on paper, and our "adopted" Son has just
turned 18. The kid's name is Paul, he skates with me
and Simonetti for BallBag skateboards. He's hurt
pretty badly from filming stunts he's just not capable
of, so Simonetti and I decided to hook him up with
some footage. I'm also practically sober in this
wonderful piece, and we just finished it . Rog, let me
know if you're happy with my usage of your BB-Gun hit
in this masterpiece of a clip, it's of my unofficially adopted son
(a.k.a. "rookie"), Simonetti, and me:
I'm just going to keep filming my own shit, like
fuckin Oprah-- until I hear back from Bunim/Murray
about that company doing the right thing.
Love you all,
Steve-O
P.S. Check out my hot wife!
February 12, 2008
To Everyone That’s Worried About My Drug Abuse...
I don't tell anyone else what they "gotta" do. Ever.
If I can help it. I hate giving orders, ALMOST as much
as I hate taking them. So, suck my fucking dick if you
don't like my lifestyle-- I HAPPEN TO BE VERY FUCKING
PROUD OF IT. I'm also really proud of Ryan Simonetti.
Here's why:
Love you all,
Steve-O
February 11, 2008
Hey Everybody, Meet My New Landlord!
Yo Tommy,
Before I put this rap album out, I need to have a song
on it that pays homage to the late, great Eazy-E. A
song about blowjobs saving the World. To make that
song I need a very famous drummer. I've thrown this
idea at both you and Lars Ulrich, both of you are
slouching. Let's pick a damn day and do it, you won't
believe how I am in the studio, I'm fuckin "Bonkers",
check out the time I met my new landlord (leasing
manager dude) in the wake of a recent neighbor war:
Love you all,
Steve-O
P.S. Nikki, care to slap some bass on a song about
blowjobs saving the World, to pay homage to the late,
great Eazy-E?
February 9, 2008
Buckle Your Seatbelts...
While I'm handing people's asses out, like a real
gangster, allow me to ask something of the drummer of
Metallica. If I can it with the religion and politics,
are you down to record a track with me and Regg, to
pay homage to the late, great Eazy-E? My shit is
already really hot, I think you can feel it. I'd like
the song to be about blowjobs saving the World. The
question is, Lars Ulrich, are you going to make me add
Tommy Lee to my rad e-mail list again, or are you
going to provide me beats from a band that's bigger
than Motley Crue. I'm thinking Metallica, Lars, and
all I need is you. Let's make the World a better
place. Please get back to me about that soon, Lars,
it's really time for a "grand slam in the bottom of
the ninth". And, buckle your seat belts, everyone,
this right here is a rough, rough ride, pay attention,
Lars-- watch the law catch up to me:
Love you all,
Steve
February 8, 2008
A Move That’s Been Proven To Go Wrong...
My Dad and sister have only been included on this
e-mail list a couple of times before. Both of those
times turned into nightmares. So, here I go again, Dad
and Cinds are copied on this e-mail. I'm going to
share with them an on-camera interview that I did with
Dr. Drew and Tom Green. I think Dr. Drew can agree
that it was a great interview, although I'm sure my
father and sister will probably see it as something
they feel I should be ashamed of. I'm not expecting
you all to have time to watch this amazing interview,
but, I can point out that it is terribly easy to click
right through to the "hot parts". Let's get some
"reply all"s outta this one, please, my relationship
with the family could surely benefit from it. They've
been begging me to see more shrinks, and I'm just
gonna go ahead and say that this interview with Dr.
Drew counts as one of those visits. Here it is:
http://www.mefeedia.com/entry/dr-drew-and-steve-o/6097322/
Love you all,
Steve-O
February 7, 2008
I Ain't Runnin, I'm Streakin!
I decided on a television series on MTV... Here's how it starts:
February 6, 2008
Steve-O Becomes Wanted At The Stroke Of Midnight
Date: Tue, 5 Feb 2008 00:00:00 -0800 (PST)
It's 11:57, Jeffrey Ross, is still on stage, and still
smokin', cuz this asshole gave him a serious roastin',
hell this is for fuckin MySpace postin', 11:59, here's
to toastin':
Steve-O
February 4, 2008
Someone Arrest Me...I’m Skipping Court
Time to be serious, I'm skipping court and I couldn't
care less. Issue a warrant for my arrest, I can't
think of a better way to get press, give my rapping
a chance of success, and crown me the White Rap King
of the West. Talk about a vacation from stress, a
chance to catch up on needed rest, preferential
treatment for celebrity guests. It's called K-10,
short for VIP, aka protective custody, the only block
with the possibility, of being alone in a cell
watching your own tv, able to masturbate with
some fucking privacy. Now, Universal, and all reps for
me, last call to pay M.O.P., before they react very
VIOLENTLY, pay them fucking INSTANTLY.
Steve-O
P.S. Check out how much radder my mixtape site is now!
January 31, 2008
pretty sure I'm not supposed to leak this....
Since my last rad e-mail, I've flown to New York City,
shot the cover for my Universal Records rap album, and
returned to LA to bring you a peek into how I handled
the shoot:
Love you all,
Steve-O
January 28, 2008
Let the Games Begin
Check out how Dr. Drew proudly approves of me
describing murder as "fun", while soliciting people to
"shoot everyone". I can't believe how happy this clip
makes me:
So, it turns out that I rule at rapping, mostly
because of my love of fucking drugs, guns, balls,
dicks, and naked fucking chicks, and, of course, my
friendly relationships with so many iconic individuals
in the rap game. Now, Universal Records, let the games begin:
http://www.steveomixtape.com
Love you all,
Steve-O
January 25, 2008
comedians, be warned...
There's a new name on the list. He's so damn excited
about my shit, he came over to spit. Check it out:
http://www.ballbagmedia.com/videos/whathiphopneeds.mov
Love you all,
Steve-O
January 23, 2008
I’m The Man Of The Year!!!
Fuck people who wear fur. I'm the man of the year.
Check it out:
Love you all,
Steve-O
January 21, 208
The Filthiest Crap Ever
I don't fucking give a shit. I'm doing it my way:
Love you all,
Steve-O
January 20, 2008
I truly had to beg for my life tonight...
Franz came back with a vengeance. So terrifying, we
had to write, record, and shoot a music video for a
song about Franz being out to kill us. We figure we're
still marked for death, so I already leaked this new
song, and music video. If we live to see this album
come out, I'm telling you all, and the world,
"Someone's Out To Kill Me" IS ON MY FUCKING ALBUM, so,
start appreciating it now:
Love you all,
Steve-O
January 19, 2008
more from Universal
It's not like I'm some kinda jerk, it's just that it's
not easy being a white gangsta rapper. I'm, like,
talking about selling a rap album:
January 17, 2008
I Wrote Some Crazy Emails
I had a great talk with a guy from Universal...
January 17, 2008
Stephen Glover wrote:
We were talking about how I've been a real pain in themy last correspondence with that Universal dude...
ass. Hell, I do it professionally. The thing is that,
to make this album a reality, with an MTV special, and
a mixtape, and a WAY too hot for TV "Making Of", plus
all these videos-- it's taken a lot of work. I've paid
out of my own pocket for every flight for my whole rap
crew, my video guy (Greg Kaplan), and for every studio
session with cash, or a check from my business
manager, while my representatives have been
lolligagging over paying anyone a penny from the funny
little budget. I've spent more of my own money, well,
not more than I spent sueing the fucking shit out of
those assholes that co-signed the 3 million dollar
life insurance policy on me-- while lying to my face
to cover up the fact that they were the beneficiaries
(they were able to do that because I didn't want to
find out if I was healthy or sick), but I made this
album happen, "in house", without a whole lot of help,
so I decided to go ahead and have fun being a dick
about shit. Of course, all of my "dickiness" has been
deliberately to sell units. The dude from Universal
agreed that I was right about that, and he also
agreed that, despite my recklessness with this very
"rad e-mail list", there has been no leakage
whatsoever in cases where I've politely asked for my
shit "not to be leaked any further". This is one of
those cases, please don't leak this any further, but,
feel free to mention that you just saw the BEST
FUCKING MUSIC VIDEO EVER MADE! Enjoy:
Sorry, Steve-O Army, I can't leak this, but it kicks ass!
Love you all,
Steve-O
P.S. Universal is working out a plan to release my
mixtape as well. Thanks, guys!
January 17, 2008
Franz Fleischli wrote:
The record is gonna be pushed back unless jukes
gets the paperwork in tomorrow.
Stephen Glover wrote:
I don't give a fucking shit. And Jukes damn well don't
either. What did you think of my "Dumb Idea" video?
Franz Fleischli wrote:
Im coming over.
Chris Pontius wrote:
That shit tears the bones from my back. It's a death
trap! It's a suicide pact! We better get out while
we're young, cause tramps like us...Baby we were born
to run!!!
witness the terrifying arrival of the Universal dude...
P.S. Here are my mixtape covers:
Love you all,
Steve-O
January 16, 2008
mixtape news... (I’m in rap to be a gangsta)
Here's a funny one, once this artwork is approved by
me, I'm going to inform Universal Records that their
mixtape department that just started is being called
out by their own artists, in a battle to sell mixtapes
hosted by Superstar J in the east, and Cypress Hill's
camp in the west. It will be fun to find out who
really is "hot in the streets", without my rapping
ability on trial... Check out the first draft of the
artwork, and, Universal, don't worry, I'll make you
sure you got it:
Love you all,
Steve-O
January 15, 2008
Paparazzi Stuntman and Hard As A Rock Release...
Hey Everyone,
I'm gonna just say it, Paparazzi Stuntman, and Hard As
A Rock comin' at ya on April Fool's Day. There, I said
it, that means I've got work to do. Good idea to show
some video making skills right now. This here shit is
done leaked, so check it:
Let's make this happen guys, paperwork's done,
Love you all,
Steve-O
January 12, 2008
Hello, And A Very Special Treat, From Chicago
Before I left New York, I visited the G-Unit offices,
I filmed more with 50 Cent for Paparazzi Stuntman, did
some wild-ass shit with Tony Yayo and Prodigy (whose
going to prison for three years very soon...FREE
PRODIGY!!!), and recorded the most fucking amazing
song with M.O.P. about beating dudes asses that anyone
will ever have heard. Really, FUCKING AWESOME. Now I'm
in Chicago, will be partying at Club Enclave tonight
if any of you are in town and want to come rage with
me. Now, without further ado, I leave you with the
absolute best YouTube clip that I've had stuck on
there in AGES. Holy shit, will this clip sell units of
my album, and, I'll NEVER do this shit again, check
out this fuckin gold:
Love you all,
Steve-O
January 9, 2008
back in the projects...
Trying to hail a cab in Manhattan can be difficult,
but trying to get a taxi driver to take you from
Manhattan to the projects in Brooklyn is just about
impossible. If any of you ever find yourself looking
for that ride, be sure to call a town car. Tonight I'm
going to be recording a very violent rap song with MOP
about beating dudes up. I'm very excited to get to
say, "look at me goofy... I'll knock you out like a
Roofy..." Guaranteed to be a hit. Last night I was
rapping on the Carson Daly show on NBC, I performed
Poke The Puss-- "flip the bitch over and tap the tush"
didn't get any beeps, but "puss" and "kush" both did.
Considering that I declined make-up entirely, I have
to say that I looked excruciatingly hot. Really, check
it out!:
Love you all,
Steve-O
November 27, 2007
I'm Nuts
My family is convinced that I've got bipolar disorder.
I don't know if I agree, but, I've come to terms with
the fact that I'm somehow fucked in the head.
I've been contemplating actually being bonkers, and
decided that it's pretty rad if you're stoked about
it, and I think there's alot of good stuff that comes
with being a looney tune. I agreed to go to a
pyschiatrist for a professional evaluation, to try and
figure out what specific category of nutjob I fall
into. I've decided that I want to make a rad project
out of finding out what the fuck is wrong with me. I
sure hope this psychiatrist is down with me having my
evaluation filmed, because if he isn't, I'll probably
get really grumpy. I can imagine a rad documentary
about me getting shrunk, whilst continuously doing
dumb shit like jumping a motorcycle off a ramp in my
living room out onto the roof of the building next
door, becoming the king of crashing port-a-potties,
and all kinds of other rad stuff. I think the entire
spectrum of insanity that my "rad e-mails" have
included should comprise the content of this project.
I also think it's time for me to rent out a 6,000+
square foot warehouse, with bitchin offices, a
recording studio, and everything. It'll be my new
BallBag Headquarters, a bitchin compound to do really
dumb stuff at while a shrink tries to make me less of
a damn fruit loop. I'm really pretty sure that I'm out
of my goddam mind. Who the fuck stays up for three
straight days having gnarly hallucinations, while
writing even gnarlier shit to this fucking list of
people? It's completely nuts, and I can't help but
love it. Rad e-mail list forever! Woohoo! Oh yeah,
look at what Ryan Simonetti has been up to in my
skatepark apartment, he is truly incredible:
http://s71.photobucket.com/albums/i133/yodagrind/?action=view¤t=Ballbag_Park_Oct_19_07-Sequence1-1.flv
Love you all,
Steve-O
October 28, 2007
Why Halloween Rules
If you ask me, we're going to get our fucking asses kicked by terrorists sometime very soon, and, before it becomes uncool to be funny again, I'd just as soon leak as much shit as possible, to keep as many people happy as possible while I still can. That's why I went ahead and shot something early this morning and already have it read for mass-leaking all over the Internet. It's funny, and will make people happy. you all can put all of these clips everywhere and anywhere you want:
Happy Halloween!
Steve-O: The College Days Trailer
Steve-O: The Paparazzi Stuntman Trailer
Steve-O: The Hard As A Rock Trailer
Ryan Simonetti Stunt Reel
Enjoy! Love you all,
Steve-O
P.S. We weren't kidding at all about making that wall go away so that we could make our ramps bigger, check out these two photos of my skatepark pad, and get a load of my new office pad.
October 25, 2007
Double For Nothing!
Hey Everyone,
This "rad e-mail list" has me jazzed. So jazzed, that I decided to make sure that I got exclusive footage just for you special people. I decided, "fuck it, I don't need to be all heartbroken, I'mma rent a cargo van and go fuck shit up in San Francisco with the world's greatest professional skateboarder, Ryan Simonetti, and the world-famous "shady prop guy" from jackass and wildboyz- since day one". We came up with a bunch of shit, but, Simonetti is the king. We're saving plenty for Dr. Steve-O Season Two, but, you guys just have to see this clip. Fuckin Ryan Simonetti-- the world's greatest professional skateboarder...
Love you all,
Steve-O
P.S. That cargo van ain't going back until this ramp comes flying out of it. Plus, we've got napalm beef with bb guns still...
Hey Everyone,
I want you all to know, that the reference I made to having my heart broken in that last mail, which had that footage that blew your fucking asses off, had nothing to do with any dumb girls that hurt my feelings for fun. I went to San Francisco to meet up with the folks from Zeitgiest and figure out how to use bb guns with flammable liquid to protest the war. I also needed to wrap my head around how to communicate that my new nephew has Down Syndrome, and search for a way to help children with Down Syndrome all over the world. Fuck bitches that hurt my feelings, and, please, reach out and help a kid with Down Syndrome. Plus, don't be mad at me for attaching this additional clip of Ryan Simonetti which was shot here where we live-- at BallBag Headquarters. Please help those kids.
Love you all,
Steve-O
October 23, 2007
No More Crap, Thanks!
Hello Everyone,
Many times I read messages from people on here who are wondering if I'm really reading them. I'm willing to bet that I get to much more of them than anyone realizes. I love my fans-- it's never been about money for me, it's always been about you guys. Now I'm going to respond to some posts that attracted my attention:
1. The person/people who felt that what I posted from my father was/is somehow ignorant-- can suck my dick. When I read a post which said, "I thought you got up earlier than that", I almost had my administrators respond with hate mail. Of course I didn't, after all, silence is the deadliest weapon. Hear this, I never said we need to live in fear, I just said it would be a good idea to read my father's mail.
2. Dr. Steve-O isn't extreme enough. Haha! Dr. Steve-O is plenty fucking extreme, it's the USA Network your beef is with. I got a dude's dick sucked by a porn star in a sperm bank, and they didn't show any of it. Shitter. Alot of celebrities have television shows, and, without naming any names, a great many of them allow their producers to make absolute puppets out of them. That's right, I think that's bullshit, you won't catch me letting anyone but me express my feelings. My feelings are done being fucked with, too. Wow, that felt good! You also won't catch me trying to to synch up my real life with the airdates of three month old episodes, I call that living a lie, but, enough of that. Well, one more thing...speaking of synching up PR with airdates, let me thank the people of the people who timed some beloved negative tabloid press so conveniently for everyone involved. Alright, now I'm done with negative shit. For those of you that want to see shit that's not allowed on tv, it's on DrSteve-o.com, as well as ENTIRE episodes. Pretty cool, huh?
3. I can't emphasize enough how much I love my fans. Everytime I blast stuff out to you guys I try to include something that will brighten your days, at no cost to you, whatsoever. I've not even put a link to my website in a blog for a good six months. It's time I did, for the following reasons: if you dig it when I post crazy shit on the Internet, then you should sign up for my SPAM FREE Steve-O Army Newsletter (I'm counting hits on my website that come from this, as well as e-mails! So, sign up, please!). Now, for the good news, it seems that I designed shirts that are a bit on the filthy side, and I need to get rid of the inventory. Once these shirts are gone, they're gone, I'll be putting out new designs. Here's what I'm going to do, and my wonderful assistant, Jen Moore, can verify that this is for real. Anyone who buys a shirt or shirts from www.steveo.com, will receive a personalized, autographed picture of me looking radder than ever...Ope, I just figured out which one to go for. I'm ready to write a shit-ton of letters to you guys, everything I write on these pictures will be goofy, but, my appreciation for your helping me get rid of this inventory will be truly sincere. So, I've never said it in a blog before, so, here goes, PLEASE BUY MY T SHIRTS on www.steveo.com. For your own personalized, autographed letter on my bitchin ass picture, you must upload a photo of yourself wearing one of my filthy shirts and email the picture, along with your name and mailing address, to steveocontest@hotmail.com! Sign up for my SPAM FREE newsletter, too, and, I promise to keep it real, and not let anyone tell me how I feel.
I love you all,
Steve-O
October 18, 2007
The Next Terrorist Attack
Hello Everyone,
It seems that America is going to get its ass kicked by terrorists. Below is an article that my Dad sent in an e-mail entitled "Must Read". When my Dad says "must read", I always read. For those of you who hate reading enough to disregard my Dad's characteristically sound advice, you are dumbies, but, you still get to enjoy this funny terror-related clip I filmed today.
Now here's what my Dad sent me. I love you all:
Juval Aviv was the Israeli Agent whom the movie "Munich" was about... He was Golda Meir's bodyguard and she appointed him to track down and bring to justice the Palestinian terrorists who took the Israeli athletes hostage and killed them during the Munich Olympic Games.
In a lecture in NYC a few weeks ago he shared information that EVERY American needs to know but our government has not shared. His bio is below, his book is "Staying Safe".
First, I am going to share what he discussed in regard to the Bush Administration, 9/11 and Iraq and then I will share his predictions for the next attack on the U.S.
He predicted the London subway bombing on the Bill O'Reilly show on Fox News stating publicly that it would happen within a week - O'Reilly laughed and mocked him saying that in a week he wanted him back on the show and unfortunately, within a week the terrorist attack occurred.
Juval Aviv gave intelligence (via what he had gathered in Israel and the Middle East) to the Bush Administration about 9/11 a month before it occurred. His report specifically said they would use planes as bombs and target high profile buildings and monuments. The Administration ridiculed him and refused to respond. Congress has since hired him as a security consultant - but still the Administration does not listen to him.
He didn't agree with going into Iraq - said it didn't make sense if we wanted terrorists responsible for 9/11 (and also he believes in Golda Meir's approach which was to bring justice to the terrorists but do not take down civilians - killing civilians only creates more terrorists - but similar to Bush, Israel's subsequent leaders were not as insightful as Golda Meir) - however, when we did decide to invade Iraq we should have learned from Israel's past mistakes.
He very articulately stated that Israel's greatest mistake against their war on terror was to invade the West Bank and Gaza and stay there... He said they should have done the proven anti-terrorist strategy which was "Hit and Leave" instead of "Hit and Stay." Now we are stuck in Iraq and it is worse than Vietnam - Iraq is the U.S.'s West Bank/ Gaza. He doesn't think we will ever be able to truly leave because even when we are able to pull our troops back we will still have to go back regularly which will keep us quagmired. We should have hit hard and left immediately.
Now for the scary stuff.... He predicts the next attack on the U.S. is coming within the next few months.
Forget hijacking airplanes because he says terrorists will NEVER try and hijack a plane again as the people on the plane will not go down quietly. Aviv believes our airport security is